Day 5 at 3 Milligrams

Slept poorly.  Carol says I was muttering in my sleep and kicking about.  Don’t remember dreams exactly, just a feeling of paralysis.

Grim most of the morning.  Tried to fight it off by keeping busy: going to market, wiping down car, cleaning and polishing the granite in the kitchen plus other little things.
Went to club.  Did 1.5 hours on machines, only four laps because my shoulders are hurting, and I worry that swimming is not something I should be doing.
Weather very strange. Heat predicted for later in the week; today overcast with some drizzle and prediction of possible additional drizzle tonight.
Feel rather oppressively tired.
Worth noting, I guess, those feelings I had a week or so ago that my whole life has been a waste have somewhat abated.  Still, there in a deep sort of way but not so present to consciousness.  Thinking less about that–the past; and more about what’s ahead–the End.
Oh, went to drugstore and got flu shot.  Carol went too.
Still reading Great Expectations.  Closing in on the end.

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