A number of things since I last posted here.
I turned 70 this last Monday, December 14.
And on Friday, December 11, I did not, for the first time in 22 or 3 years, take any benzo med to help me sleep.
I have been nearly 8 days at 0 milligrams and am paying for it. I am completely exhausted. Drained. Feel like a squashed grade, as if my front side is in contact with my backside, as if my bones have turned to rubber. All I could do most of the morning was sit in my big chair and ache…
Carol reminds me that this is the second weekend after a reduction, and for some reason, the second weekend after a reduction (this time to 0, the terminal reduction) I feel particularly awful.
The cat is still with us, though she weakens daily.
I have gone to work out every day, even though in the prospect I can’t stand the thought of all that repetition and cold out by the pool, but I go anyway. An hour and 20 to 25 minutes on bike, plus .5 miles in pool. I am probably using about 1 k calories, and I am convinced this workout is what gets me to sleep (though I have been waking repeatedly after 2 AM).
Oh, it’s raining. Sort of. Possibly enough to keep me from swimming. But may slacken considerably by the time I get to the pool. When we first woke, sun was out and looked like no rain in sight.