Carol screwed up and said the Halloween party at the club was today and they were going to shut down at 2 to prepare. Not true. It’s next Friday. So this fucked up my usual routine and pissed me off to boot. I am savagely tired.
The morning was screwed as I rushed around doing shopping. Left for club at 11 rather than 130. Worked out for an hour; didn’t swim because they had classes. Got home round 2, exhausted from working out, on top of this being my exhausted time of the day. Which is why I go to work out around 130. I am fit for nothing.
As this afternoon proved. I ache all over.
Maybe that’s partly the new regimen, still settling in, partly may be from the EMDR.
Dreams bad again; same theme different location. Lost. This time in a railroad station: couldn’t find tickets, couldn’t locate right train, missed trains, trains going to places I don’t want to go. Scream at station master through thick plastic screen. Can’t understand a word the fucker says. I wake with the thought from the dream: what would a person’s head and face look like if he or she were hit 3000 times in rapid succession with a tablespoon!
I just don’t feel straight in the head.
Soon I will take my nap! Finally!
I will continue with .25 clonazepam and 5 milligrams Valium.