Going on 72 hours at .5 milligrams

Last Thursday, I dropped .5 milligrams, so now I am down to .5 milligrams a day.

This has been fairly hellish.

I have been terribly tired.  Even having some “pelvic floor” issues.  Fairly typical withdrawal stuff, plus waking at night repeatedly, not so much from drugs as problems with terrible dry mouth because of CPAP device.

Anxiety was increased enormously yesterday, when all of a sudden I could not access this very blog.  I contacted “sure support” and found out that in effect my blog was dead.  I had not upgraded Movable Type, and the are upgrading their servers, and all of a sudden the two were not compatible.

So I entered into an extended email exchange with the sure support staff.  They explained the situation, and helped out quite a bit to migrate this blog and “And He Not Busy Being Born” from MT.  I am typing in that right now to see if I can post something.

I felt really bad when I thought I could not access the blog. I have been working at blogging since at least 2006. So I have put considerable time and energy into that thing, and it felt like or as if here I go again, losing another part of myself as I age towards 70 (just a couple of weeks off).

Such much of what happens to me now in a daily way seems to involve, willy-nilly the context of aging. Even eating is not the same; I am aware of losing some of the acuity of my sense of taste. This is disheartening.

OK, I am going to “publish” this to see what appears online.

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