Day 3 at 3 Milligrams

Didn’t write yesterday, Saturday.

But Friday night and last night, Saturday night, I stuck to 1 milligram at bed time, one milligram at 630 AM or so, and .5 milligrams at noon and 6 PM.
So going on 3 days with 3 milligrams, and that means trouble…usually does.  Days 3, 4, 5 are usually awful.  Tense, anxious, angry.
And last night made it worse.  Because it was cooler Carol closed windows and blinds. Mistake.
We woke at 4 way too hot, had to open windows, blinds, start to fall asleep but wake when hear baby crying next door at 5…and it went on like that from there, dozing a bit, then waking and so on.
I feel just plain mean.  No purpose, no direction, and sick of the assholes and idiots that inhabit this world.  Damn.
Yesterday had to just plain drag my ass to club.  Did 1.25 hours on machine, plus 25 minutes swimming .5 mile.
I will try for that again today, though no telling how busy pool will be.
It’s 78 degrees at nearly 12.  Might be a little cooler today though wouldn’t want to bet on it.

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